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[dowhatisays]

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[recognize_an_opportunity]

I refuse to believe that you actually have glitter. You're bullshitting me.

[Actually, it's relatively believable that he's not. That's exactly the kind of thing Charlie would do.]

[dowhatisays]

Guess you'll never know then, man.

[As much as he likes your lap, Meyer, he can't reach his beer like this and his back is to the strippers. So he's going back to his seat, grinning up a storm all the way.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

I'm pretty sure that if you do have glitter, you're going to show me sooner or later. You couldn't resist.

[Aw, Charlie's abandoned his lap. He feels a little sad about it. Maybe that's why he's gesturing to one of the strippers and saying the next thing that pops into his mind...]

I bet I could strip better than that.

[dowhatisays]

You think you can do everything better, man.

[What are you thinking, Meyer...]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

That's because I can do everything better. I'm just a talented guy, what can I say?

[He's not thinking of anything. Really. This big stupid grin on his face might signal otherwise, though.]

[dowhatisays]

If you're so good at it, how come I've never seen it, huh?

[recognize_an_opportunity]

You've seen me take off my clothes before. Millions of times.

[But not exactly as a performance, that's true.]

[dowhatisays]

Taking clothes off ain't the same as stripping, come on.

[He feels warm and comfortable now. Everything bright and wonderful, and he rests his hand on the small of Meyer's back, nudging up his t-shirt to find bare skin.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Yeah, well, it's not that different. I mean, it's the difference between taking clothes off and taking clothes off to music. And slightly more slowly.

[He's not protesting that hand, though. It feels good. Everything feels pretty good.]

[dowhatisays]

Hey, man. A little respect. It's an art form. Like, dancing a shit.

[Meyer isn't protesting which means he gets to add his fingernails, just gently scratching at his skin.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

I can dance. I'm entirely capable of dancing. I'm a great dancer.

[Yep. He's good at everything. And enjoying those scratches, too.]

[dowhatisays]

Still reckon I would have seen you do it by now.

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Do you want to see me do it?

[He has a point to prove here, after all.]

[dowhatisays]

What, now?

[recognize_an_opportunity]

That's what I said and that's what I meant, yeah.

[dowhatisays]

Yes, that is exactly what I want. You, totally butt naked, in front of everyone.

[Someone still not convinced he'll do it? Only maybe a little.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

You think I won't?

[Oh, it's on now. He's even standing up -- a little shakily -- to make his intent clear.]

[dowhatisays]

Dude, you are so wasted!

[Which is clearly the funniest thing ever and entirely why Charlie is now having trouble staying in his chair from laughing too much.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Yes. I am.

[He's trying to say it in a dignified way, but it's really not helped by the way he's laughing. And the way he's starting to dance.]

[dowhatisays]

Dude. I think my eyes are burning. What the fuck are you doing.

[Meyer is dancing and it's the weirdest thing ever but he can't look away or stop laughing for a second.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

What the fuck does it look like I'm doing? Seriously.

[And now he's sloooooowly tugging his shirt up. Teasing's one of the things he's good at. Dancing, well, he's not as bad as he might have been imagined to be, at least. He can kind of move his hips. Of course, Charlie probably already knows that much.]

[dowhatisays]

[Meyer is drawing a bit of a crowd now. Even some of the strippers seem to be holding back laughter. Charlie just cat-calls and throws a dollar at him.]

C'mon, you gonna earn it or what?

[recognize_an_opportunity]

[If people're watching him, he's not noticing. He's way too busy concentrating on Charlie. And taking off his shirt. That requires some concentration, but he manages to do it in a decently sexy way. At least he's kind of following along with the music. Kind of.]

[dowhatisays]

[Charlie lets out a very enthusiastic whoop at that.]

Take off your pants!

[A few of Charlie's friends follow that with an emphatic don't take off your pants.]

[recognize_an_opportunity]

Fuck you guys!

[That's directed at Charlie's friends. He's not taking off his pants without some encouragement, though. The financial kind of encouragement.]

You gotta pay me for that.