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Seriously, you name it, I've pretty much got it.

[He gestures to his backpack. Yes, he brings a backpack of drugs everywhere.]

Dude, you're like tiny Jewish drug Santa.

[Don't mind him, Charlie is just diving straight into your bag here and having a rummage.]

Tiny... Jewish... drug... what?

[Sorry, he has to go over that one in his mind a couple times before it even makes an approximation of sense. Maybe that's because he's just a liiiiittle drunk. As soon as Charlie's done rummaging around in the backpack, though, he's gonna look through it himself. Because there's nothing about this night that drugs can't improve.]

Y'know. Without a beard.

[WATCH OUT, Charlie found coke. Tonight is going to go great.]

I'm gonna go to the bathroom.

[He gives Meyer another kiss before heading to the back.]

I could grow a beard. Then I'd really fit your weird metaphor.

[Oh no, Charlie doesn't get to take all the coke, not before Meyer gets some of it for himself. That's probably why he's following him towards the bathroom.]

You better be sharing that.

Dude, I wasn't gonna do it all. Kinda wanna live to see my twentieth birthday too, man.

[He's just going to do a line on the sink counter because why the hell not.]

You realize that when you turn twenty I'm really gonna have to make fun of you for being old, right?

[Hey, he's still eighteen and still will be for awhile. That means he's allowed to make fun of Charlie being ancient. Although right now doing all of these drugs sounds like a more pressing matter than mockery. And he's not content to do just one line, either. Going over the top a little bit? Yeah, maybe. It's what's required when there's all this glitter around.]

Yeah, but then you'll nineteen, dude, doesn't even work.

[Hey, share some of that. If Meyer's doing two lines...]

What's up with yous tonight you don't get fucked up that much.

Yeah, but then I'll still be a teenager, and you won't be. Weird, right?

[Fine, fine, he can share.]

It's your birthday. I'm trying to celebrate. You always tell me to loosen up. This counts as loosening up.

Yeah, just never thought it would actually work.

[Once he's done, he pulls Meyer in by his hips, fingers curling into the loops of his jeans.]

You look good tonight.

Yeah, well, don't get used to it. Special birthday situation, or whatever.

[Protests aside, that doesn't mean he's not letting himself get tugged over there, and it also doesn't mean that he's not grinning like an idiot at the compliment.]

Even though I'm not wearing a stupid sparkly outfit?

That would've made it better than good.

[C'mere, let him kiss your dumb face. On the nose. Because you're dumb.]

Let's go, I want another drink.

Okay, yeah, another drink sounds good.

[Or like a really bad choice, but birthdays are for making bad choices, right? He has to concentrate on walking in a straight line out of the bathroom, but he thinks he's doing a pretty good job. Maybe. It's kind of hard to tell.]

[Luckily Charlie has more experience with heavy drugs. He's near bouncing as they leave the bathroom, drugs and booze and excitement all whirring around in his head. He gets them both a beer, and walks back to their table, greeting friends and getting hugs and high-fives as he goes. Maybe one or two kisses. Just a few. He at least looks at Meyer a little bashfully after those.]

[Get all the kisses you want, Charlie. He doesn't particularly care. He's in a good mood -- although not nearly as bouncy as Charlie, jeez, that's just ridiculous -- so he just laughs a little at that bashful look Charlie's giving him and collapses back into his seat at their table.

And that's pretty much when he starts remembering why he loves drugs so much, because all of a sudden, everything seems like a good idea. Things like drinking his beer as fast as he possibly can. And like hauling Charlie in for a big, intense, demonstrative kiss.]

[Charlie stumbles at that, half landing in Meyer's lap and laughing through it all. He kisses Meyer back, as best he can between laughter.]

Jeeze, Meyer, who says I'm that kinda guy.

Oh, well, I guess if you're not that kinda guy, I don't have to do it.

[He's still keeping Charlie here for another kiss, though. And maybe it's easy to see now why the last time he'd gotten arrested, coke had been involved, because he's in way too good of a mood right now.]

[His good mood is infectious, and Charlie can't help but want to stick around, staying seated on his lap and kissing him through the laughter.]

Too late, you started it.

Well, in that case...

[People're probably staring at them. Normally, he'd care. Right now, he's not even thinking about it, not consciously, at least. It's pretty hard to kiss him when he's laughing this hard, though. Just give him a chance to catch his breath.]

Speaking of looking good tonight, you look pretty good tonight. But you probably already know that.

You haven't even seen the glitter yet, man.

[Just guess where it is, Meyer.]

I refuse to believe that you actually have glitter. You're bullshitting me.

[Actually, it's relatively believable that he's not. That's exactly the kind of thing Charlie would do.]

Guess you'll never know then, man.

[As much as he likes your lap, Meyer, he can't reach his beer like this and his back is to the strippers. So he's going back to his seat, grinning up a storm all the way.]

I'm pretty sure that if you do have glitter, you're going to show me sooner or later. You couldn't resist.

[Aw, Charlie's abandoned his lap. He feels a little sad about it. Maybe that's why he's gesturing to one of the strippers and saying the next thing that pops into his mind...]

I bet I could strip better than that.

You think you can do everything better, man.

[What are you thinking, Meyer...]

That's because I can do everything better. I'm just a talented guy, what can I say?

[He's not thinking of anything. Really. This big stupid grin on his face might signal otherwise, though.]

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